26 Feb


Spider web;J Schmidt;1977Those of us who aren’t arachnophobes (not freaked out by spiders) tend to identify, metaphorically, with the spider and not the web. But I wondered this morning–on my intentionally lengthy walk from the bus stop to the office–if you ever feel more like the web, your long sticky axons stretched thin in multiple interconnected directions over an indeterminate space (and perhaps time) trying to catch food. Since you’re the creature absorbing those unlucky flybys you’re more like a sentient web and not just a food trap for a higher power (unless…oh, no, that would be silly, let’s move on).

Next time, insect metaphors of a traditionally sinister sort (where you’re the fly simply unable to resist the lure of a sensual glistening web) and misused metaphors (sorry, you do not Attract Bees with Honey–that phrase is a dingbat replacement for the creepy Attracting Children with Candy and the more apt Don’t Be a Dick if you want people to listen or…do your bidding.)